Tap

As they walked by the front desk of the Holiday Inn Express - Downtown El Paso, Gin and Swanic stopped to ask the desk clerk for directions to the best Mexican restaurant El Paso has to offer. Alas, they were informed by the clerk that all restaurants, with the exception of the steak house and pizza parlors, close at 9 PM. Swanic looked on sadly while Gin whined, "But we're downtown! I don't understand what's happening in El Paso!" Her obvious distressed spurred everyone into action, and within moments every visible staff member was deep in discussion about where the two weary, hungry travelers could go for some food. Soon a consensus was reached, and the clerk suggested that Gin and Swanic head to Tap, a "historic" bar near the hotel. The clerk then insisted that Gin and Swanic take the free hotel shuttle so as to avoid becoming lost in this strange city. They agreed, and the clerk found the shuttle driver. Not being fluent in English, she asked that the clerk come along to translate. Another random stranger was also recruited for the journey, and the five piled into the Holiday Inn Express van to head to the bar.

Upon arriving at Tap, the clerk requested that Gin and Swanic check it out and make sure it was okay before the van left. Immediately upon exiting the van they were approached by a number of helpful locals, all of whom insisted that the bar was the place to be and assured Gin that she could find vegetarian fare inside. Our brave duo nodded to their Holiday Inn posse, and within seconds were seated at a comfortable booth in the bar. A waitress immediately took their drink order, while another waitress, who had apparently been warned of Gin's veggie tendencies, came over with a menu and pointed to the obvious vegetarian choice: nachos. Gin and Swanic ordered their meals and settled in to watch the Olympics and observe the local culture. A number of fascinating locals were moving throughout the bar, most notably a woman (although Swanic hypothesized that she may not have always been a woman) wearing a pink bikini top and matching mini sarong, both covered in tiny bells that rang with every step. Gin and Swanic agreed that Tap is their favorite place ever. After a questionable man asked about her husband, Gin stealthily switched her rings around to carry on the impression of marriage. The food arrived, and the two gorged themselves on cheese and beans. Swanic asked Gin if she had any cash for a tip. Gin then shouted, "I have tons of cash! But only in large bills!" Swanic looked on in horror as Gin glanced around the bar to see if anyone had noticed her amateur tourist mistake. They would have to be on the lookout from now on.

Finishing their meal, and observing a couples fight building up outside, Gin and Swanic decided it was time to leave. They called the Holiday Inn, and the clerk assured them that their ride would arrive shortly. Indeed, within 7 minutes the Holiday Inn van returned, as did all of the original passengers! On the ride back to the hotel, the clerk attentively asked if they enjoyed their time. They did, sir. They did.

Gin